Out of the Dark Read online

  “You knocked the hell out of that cowboy.”

  “Well, he shouldn’t have touched me,” Em said.

  “Remind me never to piss you off.”

  “Humph, I’ve been pissed at you since Moscow.”

  “You never smacked me in the face with a phone.”

  “Not yet.”

  As he pulled onto the interstate, Em turned to him and cocked a brow. “Where are we going?”

  He couldn’t help but like and admire this tough little cookie. Most women in a situation like they’d just been through would have run screaming to the car, or sat there with their eyes shut until it was all over. Not Em.

  The troublesome thing about the whole matter was that Mac had a strange inclination that Em did what she did back there in the motel because she wanted to protect him. No woman had ever done that before. The thought sent a strange message to his heart but he wasn’t about to try and interpret.

  ***

  Emily had her heart broken before, but for some strange and unimaginable reason Mac’s coldness this morning sent her reeling into a dark void of regret, isolation and shame. Shame being the most consuming.

  Courageously, she’d fought her attraction to him since he showed up at her hotel room, now she had to face the fact that her heart had led her astray. Hadn’t it always?

  Wrong guy.

  Wrong time.

  Wrong place.

  Mac headed the list of wrongs in her life when it came to men and love. Why else would she be single and alone at her age when all she’d ever wanted was a husband and a family? It simply wasn’t meant to be. So why did she want to get married so badly? Why was having a man to love in her life so important?

  Maybe because she’d never had a steady boyfriend during those awkward teenage years. While other girls were picking out prom dresses and deciding who to go to the dance with, Emily had stayed home and studied. That’s what she was good at. Besides, guys didn’t date girls with glasses, braces and twenty extra pounds.

  Even after she was older, had Lasik, lost her braces, and the weight, every guy who caught her eye was a heartache waiting to happen. One right after the other. In all her years she’d only had one serious relationship. And look how that had turned out.

  As uncomfortable as Emily felt at the moment, she had to get her life back into her own hands. That started now.

  “What’s Stanley’s address?”

  “Why?”

  “That’s where we’re heading.”

  “Now?” So much for her tough strategy.

  “Yes, right now. I want to see those pictures.”

  “Ah, I can’t...I mean, I don’t know...Maybe.”

  “Now, Em,” he growled. “I’m through messing around.”

  “He lives at 4231 Heritage.”

  Mac put it in the GPS. “What city?”

  “Bedford.”

  As Mac pulled onto 820 East, Emily made the quick phone call to Stanley then dialed her neighbor. “Hi Debbie.”

  “Emily. Are you back?”

  “Almost, did you pick Hershey up for me?”

  “Yes, and he was ready to be busted out of the doggie hotel.”

  “Good, I’ll be home shortly and pick him up.”

  “Okay, but don’t hurry, the kids have enjoyed him.”

  “Thanks so much, Debbie.”

  She finished the call and placed her phone in the console of the vehicle.

  “Who’s Hershey?”

  “My dog.”

  “That’s a candy bar or a frickin’ cake.”

  “I like chocolate.”

  “Yeah, but you don’t label your dog with a handle like that. It’s a male dog too, isn’t it?”

  Refusing to be drawn into an argument, she nodded. She now realized that’s what Mac hid behind. Words, anger, insults. Anything to stay away from the real issues in his life.

  “He must be a real terror. What is he, some little miniature thing you stuff in your purse?”

  “Hershey is a very brave dog and I love him.”

  “What’s wrong with Butch, or Killer or Rover?” Caustic words rolled off his tongue, taunting her for a comeback, because he could handle an argument. But being ignored or attacked by a hysterical woman, like she’d been yesterday, threw him off his game. Today she was a different woman.

  A scorned woman.

  “Those are dog names. A dog deserves a decent name.”

  Mac slapped the steering and blew out an aggravated breath. He frowned. “Do you holler out,” Mac’s voice rose to a high pitch. “Come here, Hershey, Mama wants you to come home now.” He chuckled. “If you had a cat you’d probably name it Lasagna. This way you have a whole damn meal. Your neighbors must think you’re crazy.”

  Emily shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe.”

  “Maybe?”

  “I personally don’t think what I name my dog, or what my neighbor’s think of me, is any of your business.” She said, fighting back anger and the desire to strangle him. “You’re probably jealous. I imagine a man like you doesn’t even own a dog.”

  He sat up straighter. “What do you mean, a man like me?” Mac scowled. “What’s wrong with a man like me, and why wouldn’t I have a dog?”

  She turned to him with a solemn gaze, and replied in a soft, mellow voice. “You don’t collect things, remember? Plus you don’t allow yourself to become attached.”

  His mouth tightened. “I don’t have a dog because in my line of work I travel a lot.” Mac glanced out the side window. “A dog would be left alone all the time.”

  “What if you worked a nine to five job, would you have a dog then?”

  “Sure, I would.”

  “You’re lying, again,” Em said. “I can tell.”

  “I’m not lying. I’d like a dog. A big one. Like a Rottweiler, or a Doberman. I like big, mean dogs. Tough ones that eat those named Hershey for a snack.”

  “You’re even competitive with pets? Who has the biggest?” Em sadly shook her head. “That’s pathetic, Mac.”

  They traveled toward the Mid-cities in silence. And Mac had yet to agree to take her home. But that’s where she was going. No more spies, no more nuts trying to kill her, and no more lusting after a man she could never have.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Every commuter within a fifteen-mile radius inched toward big D, and Mac and Emily sat stuck in the middle of a snarled string of cars.

  Emily had maintained her calm and silence, while, much to her delight, Mac squirmed.

  “Are you hungry?” he asked. “We could grab breakfast and allow the traffic to die down a little,”

  “I’m not hungry,” she said, staring out the window.

  “How am I going to explain you to Stanley?”

  Mac clutched the wheel with both hands then cleared his throat. “Tell him I’m your new boyfriend. We met on the plane and hit it off right away.”

  Emily took two deep breaths before answering. “I’d cut my throat and bleed to death before I’d ever say that.”

  Mac drew back defensively. “I knew you were a little pissed at me, but...”

  “But nothing, I won’t lie for you. You’re on your own. My agreement ends when I get you in the door. After that, I’m home free.”

  “Listen, about you going home...” Mac slammed on the brakes as a car cut in front of him. “Idiot.”

  “Don’t talk to me, Mac.” Emily gritted out. “I’m going home, and if I have to call Frank, and tell him why, I will.”

  “Dammit. Em, I’m not good at this stuff.” He dragged his finger through his hair, and frowned.

  “Tough.” She crossed her arms. “Why don’t I just say you’re a spy and we’re being chased by a bunch of crazy people who want us dead?”

  “They wouldn’t believe that.”

  “What makes you think they’d go for you and me meeting on a plane and you following me home?”

  “I live here.”

  Anger started at the soles of her feet and traveled throu
gh her veins with the same speed as a double shot of expensive tequila. “You what?” she screamed.

  “Right off Highway 183 in Bedford. Stanley could be my neighbor.” He made the statement so casually Emily wanted to use his head for a battering ram.

  “At a formal hearing last year, you said you lived in Virginia. That’s one more lie I can chalk up, isn’t it?”

  “I wasn’t sure I could trust you.

  “I’m a lawyer, for heaven sakes. Your lawyer! What did you think? I’d stalk you or something?”

  He glanced out the driver’s window. Emily reached over and slugged his arm as hard as she could.

  “Ouch.” He rubbed the wounded area. He glared at her. “What was that for?”

  “For being a big fat liar. The biggest one I know, and as an attorney, I know plenty.”

  Way more than her fair share, and true to form, most were men, just like him. And, she’d spent the night with him in a motel! Damn, what she wouldn’t give for a do-over.

  “It was only a precaution. Nothing personal.”

  “Nothing is personal to you, Mac.” She snatched her purse and put her hand on the door handle. “Stop the car. I want out.”

  Mac grabbed her arm, and a shot of electricity hummed through her body. “Are you crazy?” He edged closer to the car in front of him. “The car is stopped, but in case you haven’t noticed, there are two lanes of traffic between you and the shoulder. Settle down.”

  She yanked free. “Don’t you dare tell me what to do. I’ve had all of you I can stand.”

  “Why you are so angry?”

  “You lied.” But that was merely the first thing that came to mind. What really bothered her was the idea of being lured into thinking he cared. That they’d made love and not just had sex. The idea that she’d responded to his touch in a way she never imagined possible, made it difficult to face him. Just sharing a ride made her yearn for his touch, his kisses...his love.

  She felt small, used, and insignificant. Her skin no longer fit her body. She wasn’t the same person as before. Mac had managed to seduce not only her body, but her mind and more dangerously, her heart.

  And now they were going to Stanley’s house. God, could her life get any worse? She nibbled on her bottom lip and prayed to be somewhere else.

  Mac turned and looked at her. “Do you realize that almost everyone who works in my line of business with a top security clearance lies?” He took a breath. “Em, it’s part of the job. Half the time wives married to agents have no idea what their husbands do. Where they go, or when they’ll be back.” He turned away. “The job is designed that way to protect innocent people, as well as those who put their lives in danger every day. If you were my wife, you’d be in the dark like other wives.”

  “You don’t get it do you, Mac?”

  He released a tired breath then replied in a warm voice. “Yes, I do get it, Em.” He laid his hand on hers.

  At his touch she nearly lost all self-respect. She wanted him to care for her the way she cared for him. But she knew now that could never be.

  “I understand. And I’m sorry I can’t be what you want me to be.”

  She blinked back tears that threatened to flood the car.

  He squeezed her hand. “Last night was the greatest moment of my life, but that’s all I can give.” His deep blue eyes held a glimmer of sadness. “Believe me, I don’t own a heart worth having. Too much sadness. Too much hurt. No room for love.” He exhaled. “Right now, you’re my responsibility and I will protect you with my life. You’re caught up in something that you knew nothing about. I’m just trying to make it all right.”

  She pulled away as a ping of regret washed over her heart, and ducked her head hoping he wouldn’t notice how deeply he’d hurt her.

  She scooted over and leaned her head against the window. “You don’t need me for Stanley to develop those pictures. I’ll tell him you’re coming, that’s all he needs. He could care less if I’m there.”

  Mac looked at her bewildered. “What’s he going to say when I walk in with your contact lens?”

  “Nothing.”

  “My ass. He’s going to want to know how I came by it. Where you are. And why you didn’t return home when you were supposed to. How am I going to answer all that, huh?”

  “Lie. That’s what you’re good at.”

  Mac angrily slapped the steering wheel with the palm of his hand. “Women.”

  He looked at her and narrowed his eyes. “You’re coming with me if I have to drag you.”

  “Then plan on doing just that.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  Thanks to a fender-bender that kept traffic at a crawl, Mac and Emily didn’t arrive at Stanley’s until 10:45.

  Stepping out of the vehicle, Emily hugged herself, struggling to protect what little pride she had left. What hadn’t been shattered, tattered or battered by past mistakes now hung in obnoxious shreds that swirled and reminded her what a fool she’d been.

  Much to her consternation, Mac came around the vehicle and took her arm. Reluctantly, she’d agreed to act like a couple just to speed the process so she could be rid of him.

  When this was over she planned to barricade herself at home with a bottle of wine, her dog, and a Keith Urban CD. What she wouldn’t give to be leaving for Belize today instead of tomorrow afternoon.

  As they walked toward the house, their gazes clashed, and Emily forced a miserable smile. Mac looked partly apologetic and vaguely annoyed. No doubt he couldn’t wait to get rid of her, and get back to his fanciful life of love ‘em and leave ‘em rituals.

  It took every drop of willpower she possessed to keep from sitting down on the sidewalk and bawling her eyes out. Biting on her lower lip, Emily shook her head. She might be a loser when it came to men, but she wouldn’t give Mac the satisfaction of seeing one single teardrop fall from her eyes again.

  Not today, not tomorrow, not ever!

  With no way out, she squared her shoulders, straightened her spine, and prepared to be struck by another of life’s lightning bolts.

  She hadn’t seen Stanley in months and she never imagined their next meeting would be like this. What would he think? More important, why did she care?

  When they reached the door, Mac lifted one shoulder. “What? You going to knock, or walk in?” Mac shoved his hands into his back pockets and looked around slowly. “Let’s get this over with.”

  Emily pressed the doorbell and waited. The sound of Dumb and Dumber barking and yapping inside made Emily cringe. Those two miniature dachshunds were the stupidest dogs she’d ever met, and rightfully named. Of course, it wasn’t their fault. One had only to consider the dogs’ owner.

  The tapping sound of dog toenails on tile floor drifted outside.

  Mac raised an eyebrow. “Any chance we’ll be eaten alive once we get inside?”

  “No, but you might want to commit suicide before they finish licking you.”

  “Emily!” Stanley used his foot as a barrier to keep the dogs from breaking free. “I’m so glad to see you.” His boyish grin scrunched up his face, and made him look ten years younger than his thirty- eight years. “How was Russia?”

  Before she could answer, Stanley’s eyes went from her to Mac, and his enthusiasm melted like a chocolate bar on a summer day. “Who’s this?”

  Emily gently shoved Mac into the interior, causing Stanley to have to reach down and grab the dogs by their collars. Stanley looked awkward and uncomfortable staring up at them.

  Her sister Victoria came around the corner. “Oh! Do my babies have company?” The minute she spotted Mac her mouth instantly curled into a ‘come get me, I’m all yours’, smile.

  That well-practiced look could turn lemons into pancake syrup, and send a diabetic into shock. An absolutely glowing Victoria pressed a hand, the one with a rock the size of Montana on it, to her perfectly styled hair, and tugged at her expensive summer cardigan sweater. “Emily,” she said smoothly, without glancing in her direction. “Who’s you
r friend?”

  Sadly, Emily couldn’t take her eyes off the engagement ring. It was the most beautiful thing she’d ever imagined. She blinked back tears as her heart shattered into a million pieces.

  “Oh, you haven’t seen my ring have you?” Victoria held up her hand and admired the jewel. “It’s so expensive I can hardly believe Stanley insisted on getting it. You know, he designed it himself.” Victoria giggled. “Isn’t that sweet?”

  “Lovely.”

  Victoria looked over Emily’s shoulder and smiled so hard her dimples sunk in two inches. “So, who’s the guy?”

  Emily turned to see Mac smiling as ridiculously as her sister. She inwardly groaned. This was the story of her life. She’d never brought a guy around that her sister didn’t take a liking to.

  “John McKinsey. You can call him Mac.”

  “My,” Victoria said slowly, offering her hand. The one with the ring, of course. “I’m very pleased to meet you.”

  Mac ignored Victoria, and waved the contact lenses container in front of Stanley.

  Adjusting his glasses, Stanley smiled as he took his newest invention from Mac’s fingers. “Let’s see what we have here.”

  Solemnly, Emily followed Stanley to his office off the foyer, leaving Mac and Victoria to entertain each other. Glancing back, she grinned at Mac dancing around while the dogs clawed at his pant legs.

  The little dachshunds had him trapped between them, the wall, and Victoria. He didn’t know it, but he wasn’t going anywhere.

  “Nice doggies. Good doggies. Now go away,” Mac said, as he tried to follow.

  “Have you heard back from Sony yet?” Emily asked Stanley.

  “No, and the government hasn’t notified me either. It’s just a matter of time. You know how it goes. I’ll sell the patents.”

  “I’m sure you’re right.”

  Stanley was a handsome guy in a Clark Kent kind of way. Most people referred to him as a geek, with his thick glasses, carefully combed hair, and casual dress code. But it never offended Stanley because he was a geek. What most people didn’t know was that he held the honor of being the best in the State of Texas. He’d made a fortune with computer programs and games he’d developed and marketed over the years.